grocery drama

My cute new shoes, cute new jewelry, cute new handbag and I decided to take advantage of the beautiful weather and amble on leisurely over to the far-away grocery store.

I had already done a TJ's run earlier in the day, so the basics (fruit, veggies, bread, milk, eggs, smoked salmon, wine, sorbet) were covered. I was a girl on a mission, but a focused mission. I had to carry the stuff back, so it couldn't be too heavy. Also, the grocery store was v. crowded so I wanted to be in the "10 items or less" line.

I unloaded my basket:
1. I Can't Believe It's Not Butter Spray
2 & 3. Better N' Peanut Butter (2 jars)
4 & 5. Light N' Fit Smoothies (2 cases, one Mango-Passion & one Straw-Banana)
6 & 7 & 8. Fat Free Cool Whip.
9. Sugar-free red raspberry preserves.
10. Laughing Cow Light cheese bites.

I looked absurd. I looked all-out-ana. I looked deranged.

The man behind me wouldn't stop staring at me and my purchases. The cashier tried to pick me up. He actually said to me, "Do you live around here? I haven't seen you here before. And I know all the beautiful girls..."

I looked down at the floor, wanting to sink into it and die. A rat scurried across, into the corner.

I am SO never going back to the far-away grocery store.